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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24557545">red side of the moon</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>RuPaul's Drag Race RPF, drag race - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>3am is a reoccuring time bc gay ppl are nocturnal, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Gigi POV, It's cute sometimes though, based on rsotm by trixie mattel, don't date a gay girl if their ex is still alive, i don't know i wanted to write something, it's completed i have no idea where the completed check went LMAO, nsfw at ONE SENTENCE... das it, women</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 02:16:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,994</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24557545</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>gigi goode was 100% sure that if crystal wasn't in her life, she'd be lost.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gigi Goode/Crystal Methyd</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>54</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>red side of the moon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>judy never asked her for forever.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“are you </span>
  <em>
    <span>kidding?</span>
  </em>
  <span> you’ve got to be, there is no way you don’t like the office!” gigi shouted, kicking her legs on crystal’s comforter. “i can’t be with you anymore. legitimately. sorry, you have to exit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“it’s my house?” crystal chuckled, doing the exact opposite by putting her nose on the crook of gigi’s neck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“ask me if i care. ask me. please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“do you care?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“no!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy never asked her for the moon.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>gigi pushes a piece of crystal’s blonde hair behind her ears. she was asleep, snoring softly and moving </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> damn much. she wasn’t a blanket hog, no, she just liked to adjust her sleeping position every five minutes. gigi’s head over heels for crystal, yes, but every time they sleep next to each other gigi finds herself awake. she likes to take this time to really get a good look at the person she wants to be with for eternity, when crystal can’t shy away from her stare or cover her face with a hand. instead, she crushes some other part of gigi’s body by sprawling out like a starfish. gigi goode was 100% sure that if crystal wasn’t in her life, she’d be lost.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy knew that loving her was better,</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i fucking hate chem class! i hate it! i am burning the entire lab to the ground and getting away with arson,” crystal complained as she usually did after sixth period. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“if they catch you, you wouldn’t be able to be with me.” gigi would always be amused by crystal’s hot-headedness, especially with threatening to commit a felony. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>crystal let out a long groan, throwing her head back in anguish to this point. gigi kissed her girlfriend’s forehead. the blonde smiled in response. small motions like this meant a lot to gigi, who knows that crystal had trouble expressing her affection very well. a smile like that set gigi’s heart ablaze, and they walked down to seventh-period lunch together.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>and no one knew her heart like judy.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>a one am phone call was always welcomed, but never expected. gigi, blessed with a day where crystal didn’t sleepover and break ten bones, woke up to her girlfriend anyways. she definitely wasn’t complaining.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“baby. love of my life. center of my universe,” crystal started, “a beautiful and intelligent woman, please remind me that i’m real and not, like, on the truman show or something. are you paid to date me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i wouldn’t get paid enough. i’m super broke. you are in fact real and a sentient being, and i’m an unpaid lesbian in love with you.” gigi’s sitting up in her bed now, fully awake and fully grinning at crystal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“yeah… i’ll see you in twenty minutes.” crystal hangs up the phone with no other warning, and gigi gets up to brush her teeth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy’s never mentioned in the papers.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“guess who’s going to fucking pratt institute, bitch!” crystal’s hands were shaking as she held the letter. her wide eyes were holding back tears, an expression of absolute awe on her face. gigi’s smile faltered, but resounding pride overcame her unease.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“any scholarships?” she asked, instead of </span>
  <em>
    <span>please don’t move away from me.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“half ride, motherfucker!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“baby!” gigi took her girlfriend in her arms, both crying for different reasons. “i’m so proud of you. you got in your dream school. god damn.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>crystal broke away from the hug, reaching up and cradling gigi’s face in her hands. she whispered i love you, and wiped a tear off her face. gigi leaned in and kissed her forehead, then her nose, then her lips. she wanted to live in this moment forever, just the two of them holding each other. happy. gigi broke away from the kiss.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i love you too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy’s never noted in the news.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>the lunch table always discussed college. always. sure, they were seniors, but it always made gigi feel worse and worse about herself. jackie to ucla, lux to amherst, nicky to fit and crystal to pratt. gigi let them talk excitedly about all of their moves. nicky and crystal already planned how they would see each other like middle-aged women going to brunch. they awkwardly glanced at gigi every now and again, who was going to the local community college. she completely bombed her first two years, so her plan was to get the associate’s then see what goes from there. and, on top of that, while her friends change the world with art and science, she wanted to be a school teacher. not really glamorous for an eighteen-year-old. crystal was going in for fine arts. she already had made a name for herself in the art world, and she’ll only hone in her talents.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“do you think there’s any hot undergrads who want a law degree? besides me, of course,” jackie said. jackie was always smart, holding a high 4.0 and top ten in the class. gigi </span>
  <em>
    <span>wishes.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“oh but of course babe,” crystal squeezes gigi’s hand in silent reassurance, “but none as sexy as you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you’re completely right.” jackie ate a fry off of nicky’s tray. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy knew that loving her was safer,</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“holy shit,” gigi said under her breath as crystal exited her house.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“don’t get your panties in a twist,” crystal said. obviously gigi knew crystal was going to look absolutely gorgeous on their prom night, but she never expected this. a red, deep v-neck maxi dress that went down to the floor. </span>
  <em>
    <span>she’s trying to kill me. </span>
  </em>
  <span>“i wanted to match your hair.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>gigi started to feel a little insecure with a black midlength she had borrowed from her mom. she just couldn’t get the dress of her dreams. life doesn’t work out that way. like how crystal was moving miles away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“now, pretty girl, let’s take a look at you!” crystal took her hand and spun gigi around. “how do you walk in those heels? towering over me even more. let me wear my docs in peace.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“be quiet, you’ve seen me in this before,” gigi said, taking a piece of hair between two fingers in anxiousness.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“and you don’t get any less mesmerizing. come on, i want to embarrass you by dancing super aggressively to the cotton eyed joe.” crystal, hand in hand, led gigi to her car. gigi felt like she could fly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>loving from the red side of the moon.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>3am. they were both awake, just staring at each other. skin on skin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you wouldn’t leave me, right?” gigi whispered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>a pause. “no.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>loving you from the red side of the moon,</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>senior spirit week was something gigi and crystal have looked forward to since freshman year. crystal planned her outfits weeks in advance, and then went into gigi’s closet to see what matched. today was monday- decades. crystal settled on the eighties, forcing gigi to wear leg warmers. atleast she didn’t have to crimp her hair-- no, crystal did that even if there wasn’t a theme.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“look at miss sexy yoga teacher over here!” crystal shouted as gigi opened her locker. gigi smiled and pulled on the fishnet gloves her girlfriend made her wear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“if i’m the yoga teacher, what are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“super cute femme 80s lesbian who likes to go to raves,” crystal said. of course, she had a little back story on her look. she probably had a back story for every single person she was going to be this week.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>crystal skipped around the hallway to her first period, probably feeling her entire fantasy. she was just so full of love and life, and in turn, gigi felt the same way. one more week and they graduate. one more week until they have to have a conversation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>loving her was funnier than a saturday cartoon.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“baby!” crystal yelled, straddling gigi’s lap. normally the redhead hated being woken up from an after school nap, but this was definitely more than okay. “ we graduate tomorrow! tomorrow! we’ll be free from this shit hole!” gigi’s staying another two years.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i know! we’ll never have to see anyone we hate again!” it wasn’t even a question on how crystal got into her house. even if gigi disappeared into thin air, gigi’s mom would still let crystal in for dinner. sometimes gigi thinks her mother likes crystal more than her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“and we have a summer to ourselves to like, i don’t know, punch cops or something!” her voice was light and excited, positive. </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe she’ll do long distance.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“what are you wearing under your gown?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“baby i thought you’d never ask--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>crystal went onto describe, in excruciating detail, every part of the look she had in mind. down to each individual fabric and layer. to gigi, it sounded like chaos, but she knows it’s going to look as jaw-dropping as usual. but, on the tenth minute, it got a little tiring. gigi simply stuck her hand under the waistband of crystal’s shorts to stop her rambling.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>someday is a story and it’s the one i’m sticking to.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“congratulations to the senior class of 2018!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>loving from the red side of the moon.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“beach, beach, beach, beach, we are at the beach,” crystal sang as the circus of their friend group piled out of the clown car.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>while everyone was in coverups that they intended to take off </span>
  <em>
    <span>at</span>
  </em>
  <span> the sand, crystal just wore her neon green two-piece and that’s it. gigi knew damn well crystal would end up in her shirt at the end of the day. her girlfriend dashed out of the car, sprinting beeline toward a spot perfectly close to the ocean without getting soaked. which, was a little unnecessary, since it was a wednesday.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“let’s go to the beach-each, let’s go get away,” lux sang in response, which enabled crystal to start yelling the lyrics as well. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you both are fucking dorks.” gigi interlocked her arms with jackie and walked toward where crystal torpedoed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy grew up stepping right beside her,</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“but… you told me…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> what i told you, geege, but you and i both know it’s not realistic.” crystal raked a frantic hand through her wildly curly hair. she was pacing around gigi’s room like a madwoman, crocodile tears running down her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“it’s not even that far,” gigi said, sitting in her desk chair. </span>
  <em>
    <span>she promised. she promised she promised she promised.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“it’s eight hours away! you’re staying here. i’m going to a </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> good school an-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“if you loved me you would wait until i’m in new york with you!” gigi shouted, “it’s only two years, and there’s facetime and texts and calls an- and,” she stuttered over her words, not knowing what to say next.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“it’s not worth it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you’re worth it! we’re worth it!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>crystal took a deep breath and closed her eyes. “you’re not worth it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>loved her from the cover of the crowds.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>she’s been in bed for about two weeks now. all she had were lays wrappers and gatorade bottles littered beside her. gigi has spent countless days spent playing crystal’s snapchat story. crystal broke up with gigi the day she left. four years down the drain. gigi meant nothing to her? how could she have not been worth it? if gigi were the one moving, she would have kept crystal for as long as she could.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>but no. gigi was in north carolina, sobbing in bed and watching the love of her life make out with random girls at sorority parties. it’s been two weeks. crystal probably hadn’t loved her for weeks. months. gigi probably was just her high school fling but, fuck, it was so much more than that. it had to have been.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>jackie and nicky text her. she doesn’t reply.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy’s heart was beating right beside her,</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>gigi: </b>
  <span>ikneow youdjre nont goingt o read this</span>
</p><p>
  <b>gigi:</b>
  <span> im very vdyr drunk right now</span>
</p><p>
  <b>gigi:</b>
  <span> it’s bendm thrjeee months and toyoure still the prettieist woman i have evevrn seen</span>
</p><p>
  <b>gigi: </b>
  <span>i miss you so much</span>
</p><p>
  <b>gigi:</b>
  <span> i still lolove you</span>
</p><p>
  <b>gigi: </b>
  <span>whhat tidid i fdo</span>
</p><p>
  <b>gigi: </b>
  <span>cant you fucking answker me?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>even with the music loud.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>crystal: </b>
  <span>i’m sorry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>and judy’s never minded all the waiting.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>but time moves on, and so does gigi goode. she did a fuck ton better in her classes than in high school. she finally understood math, and was on the track to go to a four year. her second semester was pure success, and gigi got that 4.0 that the lunch table always talked about. and she was on the right track. she stuffed crystal elizabeth methyd to a deep dark corner of her mind that only wandered out during hookups and 3 am. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>she can’t not think of her when she’s with other girls. she’s always in her mind, like a parasite that refused to let go. if gigi saw her again, she wouldn’t know what to do. she’d be devastated all over again. it took her months to stop crying. time will tell when she stops hurting. gigi knows she’d fall in love all over again, meaning she’d have to have heartbreak all over again. she’ll always be in love with crystal. it’ll never change. it hasn’t changed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy’s never thought to watch the clock.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>but she forgot about summer. everyone comes home during the summer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>gigi tried her best to stay away from </span>
  <em>
    <span>their</span>
  </em>
  <span> spots, like the coffee shop or the waterfall or the baseball field late at night. she got a job as a sales rep at a local retail shop, which allowed her to look at cute girls trying on cute outfits. she worked five days a week, and usually took doubles so she didn’t feel the need to go out wandering in town looking for crystal. she knew crystal was home, she still follows her on instagram, and gigi just kept in mind that she didn’t want to hate herself for months on end again. if she wasted her summer working overtime and drinking with jackie at their houses, then so be it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“don’t you even want to see her?” jackie asked, thumbing the top of her bottle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“no. i’m not </span>
  <em>
    <span>worth </span>
  </em>
  <span>it to see, anyways,” gigi said, standing up from the floor. jackie’s room was always neat and orderly. she kept it clean even when she was exhausted from ucla and just wanting to relax. gigi stayed in their hometown and had the room of a tornado.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“oh, shut up, i’m sure she didn’t mean it like that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“but it hurts like she did.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>the month of june flew by, with the same day repeating over and over again. work and home drinking, work and home drinking, work and home drinking. it wasn’t terrible, she had jackie and sometimes nicky. lux was friends with crystal before they became a group, so gigi wasn’t really surprised there. the worst days were when jackie didn’t come over to talk over facetime with her california girlfriend, jan. gigi knew she couldn’t rely on jackie to distract her from her thoughts, but god, she felt her loneliness at a peak there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>gigi was left staring at her ceiling, wondering where she had gone wrong for the millionth time since being broken up with. she was sure that if crystal hadn’t said those four words, she would’ve been fine. they would’ve stayed friends. but now thinking of her put a hole in her chest that grows with every aching breath and she can’t stop thinking about her and her eyes and her lips and her-</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>stop it.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>she sat up in her bed, and checked the time. 3 am. of course. gigi rubbed her makeup-caked eyes, not caring if she fell asleep and ruined her skin forever. she walked to her closet to put on a sweatshirt, and left her room. she needed closure. she can’t be stuck on this forever. even if crystal refused to talk to her besides that one measly text, gigi could get closure from letting go of a place they loved. the field.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>gigi walked to the baseball field, where they had shared their first kiss. she wanted to soak in the july air and take her time. whenever gigi went to work, she opted for a longer route so she didn’t even have to look at the stadium. the path felt so familiar, like she was going to a place that she belonged. she felt her breathing get a little easier with every step, and gigi knew that she was doing the right thing. she deserved this. </span>
  <em>
    <span>i deserve this.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>she got to the stadium. the grass was green and the air was warm. she snuck in through the workers’ entrance like her and crystal usually did. the cool metal beneath her bare feet ushered her to go on, go lay in the grass, go breathe.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>when she opened the doors to the field, that’s when she saw her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>her hair had neon green streaks in it now. her fashion was still perfectly questionable. sports bra and paint-ruined sweatpants with a white swimsuit cover… and her doc martens. she had her elbows behind her, staring at the stars. </span>
  <em>
    <span>is she trying to find ours? </span>
  </em>
  <span>gigi felt her chest collapse, and she made a choking noise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“crys?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>crystal whipped her head to look at gigi.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>judy knew that loving’s in the patience,</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“i’m such a fucking asshole, i’m so sorry, i’ve hated myself everyday since then, you probably hate me too,” crystal sobbed into gigi’s sweatshirt, grabbing onto the taller girl for dear life like that was the only thing keeping her upright. “i thought it would make moving easier. it didn’t. i’m a fucking idiot. nothing feels the same and i’ve done </span>
  <em>
    <span>a lot</span>
  </em>
  <span> of shit to get your feeling back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>all gigi could do was hug her harder, speechless.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you’re worth everything to me. you are everything. you will be everything until i can’t function on this planet anymore.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>when the red side of the moon is what we’ve got.</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>first writing project i actually finished in a good period of time. ciao</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
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